Hello friends,
Today, on the eve of a landmark general election, I wonder if anyone is keen to read about my perspective on the fundamentals of Philly cheesesteaks or the best curry at Glastonbury. We all need a mental break from the politcal news occassionally - it seems to be increasingly frequent for me - but the week of the vote for the leader of the country is probably one to tune into.
I have very little, bordering on zero, politcal experience. Like many of us, nearly everything I know about politics has come from journalism and I'm losing track of who's biased which way and where is trustworthy and whatnot (remember, podcasts need to be entertaining not factual). I've learnt a lot from listening other people's opinions, including who I can safely ignore because they are unhelpful, bordering on harmful. Having a very strong political opinion without any real reason to back it up, or because of something that is unequivocally untrue, is the parental equivalent of “because I said so.” No wonder children are always having tantrums, it's infuriating.
So, if you're not sure who to vote for, please abadon this ‘article’ now. Go and read some manifestos. I would thoroughly recemmend FullFact, an independent charity who have been fact checking the election trail and historically requesting corrections from MPs and journalists who have made incorrect claims. Very useful indeed.
Following on from all that guff about factual and trustworthy information, it's time to get back to the matter at hand: porridge. I have very strong feelings about it. There are two other food opinions added below to prevent this becoming a grain-based rant, and I hope to persuade you to agree based on supporting evidence. A vote for me would be a vote against nonsense food propaganda. These are the real issues we need the truth on1:
Porridge is a scam: it always seemed to be the mantra of grandparents that porridge was the best breakfast because it filled you up so you had plenty of energy until lunchtime. Well, we all now know this is a flat-out lie. I know from my own experience that if I have simple porridge at 7am I'm absolutely ravenous by elevensies, but there's been proper science looking into blood sugar spikes and the like that seem to support a breakfast with a mix of protein, fibre and carbs for satiety. So have your porridge with a fillet of haddock or something and you'll be fine.
Vegan cheese is cheese, not new-age wokery: the word cheese was used to refer to almond cheese in 1660, so contrary to what many-a dairy-lover will argue, it's technically not not-a-cheese and been around for yonks. It's just a subtype of what cheeses are, like fruit cheese. Having said that, if I ask for a four cheese pizza and it's almond, cashew, chickpea and fruit cheese, I will be livid (though reluctantly impressed with your moxie). I tried some new vegan cheese triangles recently and they were truly awful; I'd rather go without for now. But if people are going vegan and in need of something cheese-ish then just let them live their lives ok?
Poached eggs are not the superior egg - soft-boiled eggs are better: this one is hard to back up with proper fact but having done a very small (poorly designed, uncontrolled) experiment, I can conclude that soft-boiled eggs are better than poached eggs. Just like you, I went through that phase of doing poached eggs all the time because they are impressive and fancy, but I don't need that stress on a Sunday. Not in my thirties. My reasons are thus:
It's easier to time them to perfection. Popping eggs in shells into hot water is as easy as it is getting them out. Bung them straight into ice-water, crack all over and peel under the tap. No swirling business and witchcraft. Boiling 12 eggs leads to approximately one sad egg (a peeling issue) whereas poaching 12 eggs leads to appoximately two sad eggs (underwhelming yolk)2.
No additional ingredients or equipment are needed. Eggs, water, pan. No soaking them in vinegar and seiving out watery whites and what not. Why would you buy a silicone poaching cup? The egg has its own poaching cup: the shell. Come on, people.
Less waste and easier clean up - no pan full of hot water and ghosts to deal with afterwards.
The outcome is THE SAME. A soft, runny yolk within a creamy globe of white.
That's enough for now. I've got loads of these but it's time to put my soapbox away and let all those blokes have their big day tomorrow. If anyone in government sees this, I am free to consult on persuasive/speech writing for a reasonable fee on Tuesdays (Wednesdays if the week's snuck up on me).
Yours in egg politics,
Deb
P.S. cold sliced avocado does not belong on a hot breakfast, get away with you.
This is the silly section now, just to be clear. Don't go and vote Reform because of what I said about vegan cheese.
In an amateur kitchen, of course. I don't want to fight all you professional poachers (I do).
Avocado can stay for breakfast... But otherwise agree.